Daddy’s My Hero

At the beginning of my pregnancy, Jason decided to run his 2nd marathon {read about his first marathon here).. It just so happened that the date of the marathon was May 5th, which was supposed to be one week and one day before my due date. We joked that I would go into labor on the side of the road as I cheered for him. And then he’d have to run to the hospital to make it in time for delivery.

I don’t know if you heard, but things didn’t happen normally for us this pregnancy. 🙂

So there we were this past Sunday cheering Jason and his brother Cody along, and in my arms I was holding a ten week old baby. Pretty crazy. It was Liam’s first “outing” other than doctor’s appointments {which don’t really count}, so it was pretty special. Liam and I were definitely very proud of Daddy for running his second marathon. And of Uncle Cody! They both finished and blew us all out of the water! 26.2 miles is no joke, homie.

This first picture is one that Jason’s brother Perry took at the finish line. The second was taken by his cousin Monica. It’s Liam hanging out with me in his baby carrier at mile 19 waiting for Daddy and Cody.

Here’s a picture of my dad and I on our bikes waiting for the boys at mile 4.

And here’s a few more along the way {click to enlarge}:

Read all about his first marathon here.

Sweet Pea Shower

On Saturday, May 4th, Jasons’s mom and sisters and Aunt Tammie {with her “cohort” Michelle} threw me a family baby shower.

As many of you already know, we had endearingly nicknamed our 5 embryos our “Sweet Peas” and had written them letters along the way. Read them here and here. Several of you also wrote beautiful letters for our baby’s scrapbook. We’ve gotten a ton of Sweet Pea things along the way from you guys. Here are a few examples:

So, as the story goes…on January 18th at 1:30 am {30 minutes after my water broke} Jason’s Aunt Tammie was up and couldn’t sleep. She was thinking about Liam’s baby shower. True story. So she got online and started ordering “Sweet Pea” themed things for the shower. Ironically, she would find out the next morning that we “just so happened” to be on our way to the hospital at that exact time. So you can imagine it was pretty special for her, and for all of us, to finally get to celebrate Liam’s healthy arrival. Wait til you see these pictures! The strand of sweet peas on the cupcakes had exactly five peas in each one—and some even had little faces drawn on them—ADORABLE! The colors matched his nursery and there was black and white damask all over the place too! Tammie was so funny. With all the planning she said she had been “pea-ing” for five months.

Amazing, right?

We also played some fun games that my sisters in law and mother in law put together. One was really hard! You had to match mommy animals with baby animals and I hadn’t heard of a ton of the babies! It was funny to hear which ones actually went with the mothers. We also played a memory game with baby items on a tray.

At the end of the shower, Jason walked over with Liam in the stroller. All the ladies came out on the front porch to meet Liam! Here is a picture from that sweet moment! Jason looks like he’s lifting Liam up like Simba from the Lion King, lol!

It was a really special day. We were blessed with some really beautiful gifts and time to just celebrate with Jason’s side of the family that has loved and supported us on our journey!

Come back tomorrow. I’m excited to share pictures from Jason’s marathon last Sunday {and Liam’s first outing}.

Liam’s Nursery

Well, here it is folks!
The completed nursery {for the most part}!

It’s been a fun week. I hope you’ve enjoyed all the posts as much as we’ve enjoyed sharing them. We covered a lot of ground! We revealed Liam’s name, the nursery colors, the nursery organization details, and “The Wall.” Today, it’s finally time to share some pictures of the entire nursery put together, especially the BEAUTIFUL CRIB. Enjoy!

{To best enjoy photos, click on an individual photo to view entire gallery with pictures and captions enlarged}

Nana’s handmade curtains, with ribbons and handmade buttons

Lazy Boy Recliner and painted Ikea table

Close-up of Ikea table with Nana’s prayer book made for Liam

Plush teal pillow with handmade button

Handmade “Liam” wall hanging made with damask duct tape

“Liam” spelled out in damask alongside window

Close-up of “L” for Liam made with teal, green and yellow buttons

Side view of “The Wall”

Liam’s dresser

Dresser top with teal and green Ikea candles, damask lamps, Sweet Pea’s picture, cross and lamb

Baby Liam in a “Sweet Pea” frame

Praying lamb and beautiful cross

More pops of teal and green

Ikea change table with teal and green collapsible storage bins

Book nook with painted Ikea spice racks and another handmade curtain

Ikea doggie butt hooks in teal and green-so fun!

The beautiful crib! Wall drape, crib skirt, and bumper all made by Nana!

Come back Monday! I hope to share all of the details with you from our gender reveal party!

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Nursery Organization

Okay, admittedly we still have a ton to learn. We don’t know all of the things babies and new mommies and daddies need. We don’t know the best way to store them or stash them or have them handy dandy. But we sure as heck cannot wait to learn.

In the meanwhile, we’ve worked out some ideas thanks to Ikea to help with organization and extra storage. I don’t know if you’re like me, but I geek out on that sort of thing and definitely like things to have their place. I can enjoy it while it lasts, can’t I? I know everything is about to change…

Until then, here are a few of the awesome Ikea nursery items we purchased, their prices and links. We’re really pleased with how inexpensively we were able to organize the nursery!

Skubb Drawer Organizers {Set of 6}
Ikea
$9.99

Gulliver White Change Table
Ikea
$149

Kusiner Teal and Green Collapsable Storage Baskets
Ikea
$9.99

Algot Closet Storage
Ikea
$35-50

Skubb Hanging Closet Storage
Ikea
$7.99

We also borrowed an idea from our friends Kyle and Leah over at A Rohrblog for organizing our books {and it adds that pop of color that Jason so ingeniously recommended}. My amazing mother, Liam’s Nana, spent days painting and repainting these with Behr 730B-7 “Yellow Flash.” She’s a superstar. And, as you can see, we have PLENTY of space for more books. Wink wink.

Bekvam Spice Rack
Ikea
$2.49

So that’s it. And just for fun…here are a few of the ADORABLE outfits we plan on adorning little Liam in! It’s so fun to start to get his little wardrobe ready and to picture his chubby little arms and legs filling it out! Come back tomorrow for the best part of all…”The Wall.” I cannot wait to show you what we did!

{You can click on the outfits to enlarge the photos}

The Nursery Colors

Jesus is real.

I bet you didn’t expect me to start off with that in a blog post about nursery colors, huh? Logically, one wouldn’t start there. But I’ve got a good reason for it. Let me explain.

In my flesh, I’m a controller. I’m an only child. I like things to be just so. I’m usually right. When I get an idea in my head it’s almost certainly cemented in there for good. In a permanent-forever-ain’t-no-changing-my-mind sort of way. As you can imagine, it would be hard to be married to that. To me.

But God, in His infinite grace, saved me from myself by introducing me to Jesus. And God, in His infinite kindness and wisdom, has been working on me ever since. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

So here’s how I know Jesus is real. On my own, I’m a controller. But with Jesus, my mind is transformed in such a way that I no longer conform to {or continually revert back to} my selfish sin nature. I’m able to respond differently in situations. I’m able to discern the good, acceptable and perfect will of God. That being said, let me paint a picture for you {a black and white and teal picture}:

Imaginary Scenario #1:

{If I would have EVEN been kind enough to share the details of the nursery plan with Jason, which is not a guarantee—as opposed to just doing it and excluding him—the conversation would have gone something like this}:

Kate: “The nursery colors are going to be black and white and teal.”
Jason: “What about…”
Kate: “No, black and white and teal.”

Imaginary Scenario #2:

{This is not so imaginary and is pretty accurate to what really happened—and evidence for why I know Jesus is real}:

Kate: “The nursery colors are going to be black and white and teal.”
Jason: “What about adding in a few more colors?”
Kate: “No, I was really thinking just one color with the black and white.”
Jason: “But I think it looks really good with other colors added in. After all, it is a kid’s room.”
Pause.
Kate: {with difficulty and hesitation} “Okay, well what colors are you thinking?”
Jason: “I don’t know, whatever you think. Just more color.”

{at this point I took a few paint samples and slipped them into the slats of the crib}

Kate: {a little more convinced} “Okay…well what about adding in yellow and green?”
Jason: “Sure, whatever you think. I just like having more than one color.”
Kate: {sold} “Okay. Well that’s what we’ll do.”

What? Come on, folks. Do you know me? I’m not even exaggerating. I mean, I don’t have the conversation recorded verbatim {and we went back and forth a few more times trying to figure out exactly how we would implement the color scheme and whether or not we wanted those colors}, but there was a renewing of the mind that took place.

And why the heck not? Who the heck am I? The only parent to this child? The only one who gets a say? A decorating aficionado employed by some elite design agency? No! No way! Jason’s the dad, yo! He gets just as much say as me. And, what’s even better is…

HE WAS RIGHT!

He was oh, so right. So much more right than I was. His plan was WAY better. No joke. As the week progressed, he kept adding ideas and making suggestions that I never would have thought of, friends. And they were SO MUCH BETTER than mine. As a result, the nursery looks so much cooler and so beautiful. It looks so much more like a kid’s room than my posh-sophisticated-Pinterest-wanna-be plan. I’m so thankful. So very thankful.

So that’s why Jesus is real. Because He helped shut me up and include my husband in the planning of his son’s nursery. More important than the end result of our beautiful nursery is the fact that my husband ACTUALLY enjoyed {and felt a part of} this project. That when he now has an option of where to sit and hang out in the house, his first choice is the nursery. That he has ownership of it. That he LOVES it. And that we are more united because we worked together, than disjointed because I had to accomplish and carry out my own personal perfect agenda.

The final reveal of the nursery won’t be until the end of the week {I’m waiting on two shipments of final touches}, but in the meanwhile, here is a collage of some samples of the pops of color that my husband so ingeniously suggested:

Tomorrow I’ll show you some of the cute clothes we already have as well as how we organized the small, odd-shaped closet, dresser drawers, and changing table shelves for extra storage! And then on Thursday I’ll share my button/glue-gun project that ended up being the center piece of our main wall, and I’ll include pictures of that amazing wall and explain why we decided to put the names of God in our nursery. There’s even a really cool twist/surprise that we didn’t even plan! And hopefully on Friday {if the shipments have arrived}, I’ll post pictures of the entire nursery! Hope you’re enjoying this series so far!

{P.S.—the black damask fabric you’re seeing is a peek at the bedding and curtains that my MOTHER MADE!!! They’re amazing. I can’t wait to show you pictures on Friday!}

His Name Is…

We feel like it’s a pretty big deal to name a human being. I mean, a name sticks. It’s a forever sort of thing.

We have been talking about names for years. And, in particular, we’ve been talking about names for the last five months in preparation for this day. And in preparation for the day when we would actually meet our son. And name him. And whisper hello to that sweet boy for the very first time. By name. It will sound a little something like this:

“Hello, Liam John.”

Liam means “willful protector.” Or “helmeted one.” {Jason likes that part}. “Willful protector.” We would love to see him be a protector of the gospel. A protector of his siblings, if he has any. We’d love to see him grow to be a protector of his wife and children someday. A protector of women and children and the weak and marginalized. “Helmeted one.” Perhaps a starter for the Seahawks? Sure!

John means “God/Jehovah has been gracious.” He certainly has. It’s very fitting. Yes, when Liam enters this world we will have waited five and a half years to meet him. But let’s not forget that Liam has waited for eleven years to meet us. And to meet this world. Let’s not forget that he was cryogenically frozen for over a decade. God HAS been gracious. In choosing Liam to live. In choosing us to be His parents. In choosing to make us a family.

So that’s his name.

Liam John McKenzie.

We love it. We love him. We’ve put a lot of thought into it. And we think it’s perfect. And, of course, we can’t wait to see what he thinks.

I’m really excited to share so much with you this week. If you can believe it, our nursery is ALMOST finished. My parents were HGTV wanna-be superstars while they were here and we knocked it out like it was our job. It came out more amazing than I could have imagined. Here’s a sneak peek at the colors…

I’ll show you all of our little projects, including the wall above the dresser and changing table that has Liam’s initial in the middle of all the names of God. It came out better than we could have imagined. I also will show you our bright yellow paint projects, what I did with a little duct tape and some letters, and also my glue gun and button project. I’ll show you how we decided to organize his closet and drawers too! We had so much fun.

Then, hopefully next week I’ll get to show you some of the pictures from our gender reveal party and the details for how we planned that. Lots of fun stuff coming up on mcmiracle.

And today is 22 weeks! 18 more to go! This week baby Liam is almost 11″ long from crown to heel and he’s weighing in just under one pound. His sense of touch and sight are developing further. This means he’s working on his grip and probably playing with the umbilical cord for practice. His sense of sight, though his eyes are sealed, is also growing stronger. And he’s moving around like a champ! This past week while on the phone with a friend, he did some sort of acrobatic somersault into the corner of the womb so much so that my belly became lopsided and hard! It was his head or a butt for sure. So unbelievably cool! I pushed back on him and he swam away. Maybe the “helmet” will be a swim cap? Who knows.

See you back here tomorrow!

Halfway There!

Well, friends. We have officially surpassed the halfway mark. Last Monday was 20 weeks!!!!!!!!

Today is 21 weeks. Amazing. To celebrate, I’d like to share my belly photos from weeks 6-20. I’ve also made a collage {at the bottom} of all fifteen photos so you can better see the baby bump growing!

And here’s the collage:

A picture is worth a thousand words, so since I gave you about 16,000 words up there, I’ll leave it at that.

Happy New Year!

Baby’s Heartbeat

So I finally figured out how to share this with you. Got some help from YouTube help.

This video is really just 21 seconds of audio with a picture of our baby from our twelve week ultrasound. The audio of the heartbeat was from eleven and half weeks. This is the first time we heard the baby’s heartbeat. It took her several minutes to be able to find it. She had to maneuver the doppler all over the place before she finally picked it up. She said that was normal for how far along I was. She said sometimes you can’t even hear it until after twelve weeks, so we were really thankful that she stuck with it and we were finally able to hear it.

At the end the doctor says, “Sounds perfect. Heart rate is 166.” And you can hear me say, “Awesome!” {crying, of course}. At fifteen weeks we went in for another appointment and the heart rate was in the 140’s but we only heard it for a few seconds because then the doctor had to try to find our baby again. And, to no avail after five minutes she declared, “We were playing hide and go seek and the baby won.” Tricky little kid!

We went in again this past week at nineteen and a half weeks. The heart beat was loud and clear and we listened to it for a good minute. At first she said it was 136, but then it jumped up to 150 something. She said that’s normal and heart rates can jump like that. Has anyone else ever had that happen?

The next time we’ll hear the heart beat will be sometime around mid-January when I go in for my next OB checkup. I have one more one month after that, and then I will be twenty-eight weeks and will start my bi-monthly appointments.

So, without further ado, here is our Sweet Pea’s little heartbeat:

Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes (And Foot)

As promised, here are some ultrasound photos from our 12 week ultrasound almost two months ago. Sorry for the delay in posting! I’ll also post more recent ultrasound pics after Christmas when we reveal the gender! So exciting.

For now, here’s a profile shot of our little Sweet Pea:

And a tiny little foot shot:

What a miracle!

A First with My Kid

So I had a moment with my kid last night.

A “first” moment with my kid. The first of a lifetime of moments.

Jason had run to the store. It was almost 10 pm. I was sitting on the couch with the dogs watching TV and I started to feel some pretty pronounced kicks. I’ve been feeling them pretty frequently now over the last four weeks. In fact, earlier that night at Jason’s family’s Christmas party I had felt the kick from the outside for the first time {meaning I felt the kick while my hand was on my belly}. It was pretty exciting.

But last night on the couch, I started to feel the kicking, so I paused the TV and put my hand on my belly and applied a little pressure. Punch. So I pushed again. Kick. More pressure. Kick. And it went on like this for the next five minutes. It was one of the sweetest moments of my entire life. Our first exchange back and forth. Our first moment together. Responding to one another. It was surreal.

I just sat there with this huge grin and crocodile tears streaming down my face. Of course, Brody pup had to climb up on me because he wanted to make sure I was okay. I was like, “DOG! Scoot on down the way. We’re having a moment here!”

There haven’t been a lot of moments like that yet, and the baby definitely hasn’t kicked/punched for an extended period of time with that force. I’ll never forget that moment. He/she also has been having marathon wiggling sessions at church for the last two weeks. He/she must like the worship and preaching. Go Holy Spirit, go! Prepare our sweet child for a lifetime of worshipping Jesus. Go ahead and start in the womb!

So that’s it. That was my first moment with my kid. I had to share. I woke up at 5am this morning my time with a huge grin on my face and just had to write it out for keeping. Keeping forever.

In other news, I’m nineteen weeks today. Next week is exactly halfway.

Wow. Amazing. I’ll never be able to reiterate enough how much your prayers have meant to our family. So many of you have encouraged us deeply along the way in your faithful prayers. We love you. Thank you.

I’d love to share some pregnancy/baby updates with you this week including a very vivid dream I had last week, updated belly photos  from week 10-19, our ultrasound pictures from 13 weeks, the baby’s heartbeat (if I can figure out how to do that), and upcoming appointments. We also put up our crib and have some basic plans in place for our nursery, which I’d love to share with you.

If you would like to get caught up on our pregnancy, you can click on “Blog Series” at the top of the page and scroll to the “We Are Pregnant” series, OR you can click on “Embryo Adoption” at the top of the page as well for a timeline.

Have a great week, everyone! Almost a week until Christmas!!!!

I pray that your heart is filled with joy as you worship our King who humbled Himself, coming as an infant in a lowly manger on a rescue mission to save you {and I} from sin and death.

O HOLY NIGHT!

{I’ll be posting the 5th and final “Back to Basics: Gospel Grace 5” post later today}.

Back from NY, New Series, and Almost 17 Weeks Along!

Howdy, friends.

Happy almost December. Phew, there has been a lot going on!!!

Jason and I are back from our annual trip to New York for Thanksgiving. We brought the dogs with us {of course}, and had an amazing time with my parents, grandma, and friends. I also got to meet a ton of you that read the blog and was really encouraged to know that you’ve been blessed through mcmiracle. Thank you for reading! Blogging is one of the things that I LOVE to do and when I get to hear how God has used it to challenge, grow or bless you, it is pretty humbling. Praise Jesus.

We’re also really excited about a new church plant in our hometown of Tacoma and what that means for reaching the City of Tacoma. Our community group is replicating this week, our church is announcing fundraising pledges this weekend towards meeting the goal of buying/renovating our new church building, and God is preparing hearts to be generous in preparation for the harvest He will have in this city. It gets me fired up! Your prayers would be very much appreciated {provision, leaders, workers, HARVEST}!!!

Before we left for New York things were really hectic, and I’ve genuinely missed blogging. So I’m back in black red, white and green to say goodbye to November and hello to December and give you updates on our Sweet Pea and the pregnancy {including a belly bump photo below} as well as some really humbling/cool things God has been doing in my heart.

Starting Monday, I’ll be doing a series called
“Back to Basics: Gospel Grace.”

For the last eleven months God has really been working in my heart to bring me back to the basics of the gospel. By this I mean that Christ died, was buried, and was raised from the dead for my sin. Because of His completed work on the cross I have been given not only eternal life, but power to put my sin to death and to walk in newness of life apart from works of the law/flesh {religion: striving to be a “good person” and earn God’s favor}. There is a freedom in the complicated simplicity {that’s right} of the gospel and I want to share some practical ways that Jesus has been revealing that to me. It will be a short 5 part series. I hope you’ll join me.

And now to a Sweet Pea Breaking News Update:

I’ve felt our little baby move!!! I’m almost 17 weeks along and have been feeling flutters for quite some time that I was pretty sure were the baby. But this last week while laying on the couch in the living room of my childhood home, I felt a pretty good “poke” or “jolt” and knew for sure it was the baby. Amazing! I continue to feel flutters and movement daily and know that it is just the beginning! I’ve been getting lots of “Enjoy your sleep now” from some of you.

I’ve been feeling better. I still get sick every now and then. I have some pretty hard-core headaches. I have some difficulty sleeping {buckle up, right?}. I definitely have crazy pregnancy brain. My friend from home, Barbi, tried to teach me Pinochle while I was home. Ay gadzooks! It’s a game where you have to remember cards that were played to gain an advantage. Yeah. About that. Wait. About what? What was I saying….?

We find out the sex of the baby at the end of December. We are having a combined 30th birthday party (Jason turned 30 this month and I turn 30 in January)/ Baby Gender Reveal party. We have invited some of our friends and family to join us and Jason and I will be finding out the gender at the same time as everybody else. I will certainly keep you posted. We find out December 28th. Family/Friend polls have weighed in somewhere around 85% boy, 15% girl. Jason and I have no clue and will obviously be so thankful either way. Here’s a photo of my little growing bump!

How amazing is our God that He creates life, sustains it, and brings it to pass? It dumbfounds me and I am astounded that this is happening inside of me. I feel so humbled and blessed to be granted this gift, as I know the heartache of not having it, losing it, and longing for it {not knowing if it will ever come}. I hope I never forget that heartache. And my heart still aches with those of you that I know and don’t know that are in that place. He is faithful. His plans are perfect. He sees you. He knows. He has not forgotten you.

While in New York I was talking to my dad and these words came out of my mouth: “It makes me sick to think who I would be if God had given me a child when I wanted.” Let me qualify that. I know that He could have. I know that He still would have pursued me. But I can tell you that being a mom was such an idol in my heart that had He given it to me, I cannot predict how hard my heart would have become towards Him. How self-sufficient and proud I would have been. How much of my identity would have been wrapped up in anything and everything other than Him. I don’t know how long it would have taken for Him to soften my heart and to get Him back on the throne.

When I said that to my dad, the five years of trying flashed through my mind and I started to weep. I LOVE JESUS and I thank Him with every fiber of my soul for EVERY SINGLE SECOND, MINUTE, HOUR, DAY, WEEK, and YEAR of our infertility struggles. You guys know that this Spurgeon gold nugget is one of my favorite quotes:

“I have learned to kiss the wave that throws me against the Rock of Ages.”

My wave is our infertility. I literally could kiss it because it threw me into the arms of my King. My Rock of Ages. These five years have brought rough tide after rough tide that threw me into that Rock. It wasn’t pretty. I rebelled. I cursed God and shook my fist in His face. I despaired. I gave up. I grew tired. I believed lies. I had wicked sin in my heart towards my Father. And yet He persisted. And yet He pursued. And yet He pressed in. And yet He wooed my broken heart.

My reward is Him. Not this child.

Please let that be clear. My reward is Jesus.

See you Monday.

Baby and Belly Growth Weeks 6 to 9

Today is all about the photos.

Here’s baby growing over the course of three weeks. The top photo is at 6w1d, the middle is 7w1d, and the bottom is 8w3d! Wow. Pretty amazing.

And then here’s my belly at week 6, 7, and 8:

Here’s the difference between weeks 6 and 9 {four weeks}:

And the difference between weeks 8 and 9:

I recognize that many of you have been pregnant, or have seen pregnant women before. So this may not awe you as much as it awes me. But I just cannot believe that there is a life inside of me AND that it is growing so quickly. My only response is worship.

Stop by tomorrow, and I’ll tell you about my secret project for the baby! It’s a book that includes weekly growth, pictures, and prayers for our Sweet Pea!

Our Third Ultrasound

This was a big one. We were pretty sure that if there was no twin, then we were having one baby and not two.

This final ultrasound was with our doctor again. He came into the room, greeted us, and did the ultrasound. And there was our baby. Just one. But perfect. Growing. Heart beating. Resembling a baby more. The heartbeat was 173bpm. The measurements were right on target. The doctor was very happy.

This time there was no mention of Baby B at all.

I didn’t ask. And he didn’t say anything. Neither did Jason. We just asked questions about the baby we could see. I sort of feel like my eyes were opened more wide to the miracle in front of me and a burden was lifted off of my shoulders. Jason and I both felt like this was the first ultrasound where we were able to solely focus on, and celebrate Baby A. Our only baby. It was as if God prepared our hearts. We really had peace.

And we had joy. He/she was just perfect! I said, “Can you ever see them move at this stage {8 weeks, 3 days}?” Just as I said that, the baby moved! The doctor said, “Whoa! You called it! That’s unusual!” And then he/she moved again. It was the coolest thing ever. I think we could see tiny little arm and leg buds. And the head was much more clearly defined. We could see the umbilical cord and everything. Wow. Such a miracle. Such growth in such a short time! Here’s the special picture of our Sweet Pea at 8 weeks 3 days old:

And that was it. Our final appointment at the fertility doctor. I tried to express our thankfulness to our doctor. We literally love him. He has been such a blessing to us in the midst of some really dark and trying times. I said, “Thank you. Thank you so much. You’ve been such a blessing. We are so thankful for you.” Of course, tears were streaming down my face. He said, “You know, there are some cases that are just special, and I just couldn’t be happier for you guys. You are going to make amazing parents. Sincerely.” And he shook our hands, and told us to bring the baby in for a visit when it arrives, and with that he was out.

We graduated.

I remember the first time walking into that building. I was so sad. And even ashamed. I was embarrassed. Like something was wrong with me. With us. Like we needed to hang our heads. I remember looking at the other couples there too. They looked sad. I wondered where they were on their journey. I didn’t want to be there. I didn’t want to be “an infertile.” I just wanted to have a baby on our own.

As we walked out of that building, everything has changed. We are so grateful. We are so sure and confident that this is the road we were meant to be on. We are encouraged and blessed beyond belief that God entrusted us with infertility so that He could make much of His name through our story. I just wept all the way to the parking lot because I am so grateful and because I love Jesus so much. We are so in love with Jesus. Not being able to have kids when we wanted caused us to fall madly, deeply, and completely in love with our Savior. I’d walk back into that building a MILLION MORE TIMES if I knew that would be the result. He is good. He is so good.

Tomorrow I’m going to post some pictures of the baby’s growth over the last three weeks side by side as well as my belly growth! Who knew things would be growing so quickly? It’s all very exciting, friend. Very exciting, indeed!

Dear Baby McKenzie

This letter arrived in the mail a week and a half ago from England. Our friend, Paulina, is studying there.

October 20, 2010

Dear Baby McKenzie,

I know that your Mommy and Daddy are writing you letters, and God put it on my heart to write you one too!

Baby, do you know how incredibly loved you already are? You are a blessed child. Not only does the Lord of the Universe love you, but your parents love him and will be able to love you in a way that is truly phenominal because of it. You will be born into a community. Not just a regular group of people, but people who will love you, support you, hold you, pray for you, and cherish the miracle that you are. Baby, you are blessed.

Baby, do you know how cherished you already are? That God, that amazing God I just talked about, well he came and died for you. You know your Mommy and Daddy? They are pretty much fantastic! They long for you, they pray for you. They hold you so dearly in their hearts that we can feel it radiating from their inner-most being. They are fighting for you. Do you know your parents are warriors? Not only are they warriors, but they are strong warriors that will not accept defeat. Baby, you are blessed.

Baby, do you know how faith changing you are? You are inspiring so many people, non-Christian and Christian. Your story will move mountains. You are a part of a beautiful legacy. Baby, you will do great things. Did you know you already are? You are penetrating people’s hearts. You are a gift. Baby, you are blessed.

Baby, I love you so very much. Thank you.

Love, Paulina

I may have cried a little. 🙂 We love you, Paulina.

Welcome Haly!!!

It’s a miracle.

Jason and I wanted to post this adorable picture of baby Halcyone Marie born to Tom and Stacy yesterday morning (10.17.10) at 4:16 am weighing 4 pounds 10 ounces!!! She is so beautiful and Mom and baby are healthy!!! This is the second baby born through Embryo Adoption Services of Cedar Park! So amazing.

We are REJOICING with Tom and Stacy and can’t wait to meet Haly! Congratulations, you guys!!!!